Life Lately | April 2019
When it comes to Instagram
I’ve been a bit quiet lately — maybe you’ve noticed on Instagram, or here on the blog. And, I don’t have a specific reason to share with you as to why, other than the generic “busy” that everyone feels in one way or another.
The truth is, I haven’t been sure of what to say.
I’ve felt like I don’t really have anything to say.
I used to write out these long captions on Instagram because I had so much to say. So many things I wanted to jot down. I really wanted my Instagram feed to be like a diary of sorts, for what was really going on in my life, should someone wish to look back and remember me. Not to be morbid, but when we lose somebody, sometimes the only things we have left are their social accounts. To be able to read the captions in their voice, hear them saying certain common phrases, and looking at the world through their eyes one more time can be really comforting.
But, when an account starts to grow, it sort of becomes a service, in a way, you know? Like people don’t really want to see what I’m doing on a random day, or see photos of my cousins, or my family dog, or the gift my husband got me…they want to talk about textiles, and dining chairs and bedding. And, like, don’t get me wrong AT ALL - I want to talk about that stuff too - but I’ve just been thinking about the mix lately.
Sometimes I want to post something because I find it funny, or because I want to document it, but then I think….will this make any sense for people? Is this of value to people? and then because I’m naturally overly sensitive, I am worried that someone might misunderstand me and my intent if they don’t get my sense of humour or read my tone the way I would have said it.
And of course, there are some of you that are probably thinking “well, just post whatever you want! it’s your account!” and like, on one hand, yes. You’re TOTALLY right. But if you’re a blogger, or a content creator you know it’s like…not exactly that simple. And this is something that I’ve chosen to do. I CHOSE this, so I’m not at all trying to complain (disclaimer: this is not a complaint), I am just sharing something I’ve been pondering.
So I’ve been thinking about what purpose I want my account to serve on Instagram, and I’ll be honest, I hold back a lot.
I struggle with talking on stories because at heart, I’m a conversationalist and I really enjoy the back and forth. I want to hear your responses and have a real conversation, and sometimes with stories it just feels like I’m staring at, and talking to myself (until the DM’s roll in). It feels sort of strange to me, to talk “at” you, but I know that’s kind of silly and there are lots of bloggers I follow that I genuinely enjoy listening to, and I feel like I am now friends with (even though I def am not), that I’ve never met, and maybe have never even had an exchange via DM or comments with.
So, that’s where I’ve sort of been caught between. I think I am a pretty genuine person - so I wanted to share where my head has been at, and why I’ve been a bit quiet lately.
However, since beginning this blog post and now editing it and getting ready to post it, I feel like I’ve sorted most of this out in my head, and I’ve actually been pretty present on stories lately. But, you never know - maybe next week I’ll feel exactly like this again!
None of this is to say that I feel detached my Instagram - I don’t. In fact I feel very connected to it and to the community on there. But I’ve just felt a little tongue tied this week.
I’ve been really busy with work, which is not a bad problem to have! It’s forced me to really reevaluate what I want from this business, and how to scale it and make it something I can truly maintain. This week I’ve felt chained to my desk - (again, not complaining! It’s a great problem to have) and one of the biggest benefits of working for yourself is your ability for a bit of freedom when you need it. But, I’ve felt like a bit of a prisoner to the Creative Suite lately and I’m definitely in need of this weekend. I don’t ever hope for like, a long solid time away from work - it’s just not in my nature. My hobby is working, honestly, so it’s not even that. But the ability to maybe talk a long walk, check out some new places to get my inspiration going, or even just like properly do my hair would be nice! So, working on ways to make that happen more. With that said, the life of a freelancer/business owner is like, crazy busy one week, and then relaxed the next right? So next week it might be crickets and I’ll be regretting posting this, ha!
But, overall, feeling really grateful to be celebrating 5 months of full-time business ownership. It was always something I dreamed of doing, and some days it’s hard, but overall, it’s really freakin’ awesome.
My next project will be all about our little outdoor space. I posted about this on my instagram stories, and you can bet your bottom dollar that I’ll be posting some mood boards and inspiration for this project coming up! I’m also going to finally deal with the empty wall in our bedroom, and then honestly, our place will be pretty much done! It’s only taken two plus years to get here, phew! Then of course, for some reason we will end up moving or something - isn’t that the way life always works?
So, that’s basically been my “life lately”!