01 / Things I Wish Lived in my Closet
So, most people have issues with their body, I think that's normal. No matter how skinny or fit, or short, or tall, or muscular, or lanky, or fat you are, there are always things you see about yourself that you don't love. Of course there is a healthy line of self-improvement and self-loathing that you generally do not want to cross, but I feel like that's a post for another day.
For me, I've always been large. Even as a kid - I think I can remember back to being 5 or 6 years old, and noticing that while my friends had those classic stick skinny, child legs, I had THIGHS. My mom, bless her little heart, in an effort to protect my self esteem, made some comments that did the opposite. Recommending cardigans over dresses that showed my arms, recommending a one piece bathing suit with board shorts or a sarong, instead of a bikini like other girls my age. Insisting that I dress for my body shape, flattering being the one description when I came out of a change room. Instead of deciding how I felt about myself, I just KNEW that I was a fat person. Not a person who had fat or was fat, but a fat-person, as one entity.
So, my whole life I have dressed for my body shape - pouring over episodes of What Not to Wear, remembering the tips and feedback about straight leg, flared jeans (which would even out the line of my large thigh to my ankle and ultimately make my legs look thinner - which as I say that now, I don't actually think is true), and since I saw myself as a middle aged woman, in terms of my body type, I took all of the tips of "age appropriate" and added them to myself.
Because I was younger, I feel that in the past this worked to my advantage. People saw me as older, more mature and ultimately led to some amazing opportunities that I may have been passed over for, had I been dressing more "my age". But now, as I begin to see the slight realities on my skin that I am actually aging, along with a style identity crisis and almost all of my clothes becoming old and worn out at the same time, I realized that I need to change my perspective on my wardrobe. So, instead of wearing things that I think Stacey London and Clinton Kelly would approve of, I'm just wearing items that I enjoy. Is what I've been wearing lately flattering? Mmm....probably not, BUT I have felt more like my insides have been represented on my outsides than ever before.
Because I feel better about the clothes I am wearing, and the statement it's sharing with the people around me, I have more confidence, and I feel happy. When you feel good, you look good, no matter what you're wearing.
So, without diving further into this little origin story of mine, I want to introduce my new favourite column: things I wish lived in my closet. Enjoy!