Planning our Big Day
In late October this past year, we went to Tofino for our anniversary and witnessed an elopement on the beach and it was just so special, intimate and beautiful. It spurred on a conversation between us about our own marriage and the reality that maybe we could actually do something like that if we wanted to.
I know it sounds silly, but it was honestly something we had never really considered as an option. We both come from very large families, and I think subconsciously we had always assumed that we would need to have a large wedding to accommodate all of our loved ones. We both felt really excited about eloping and on the way home, we started that practical question....so, when?? That day we picked a date that "felt good", even before we were officially engaged!
Matthew had a plan in mind and had for a few years that he wanted to pull off. He ended up "surprising" me with his sweet plan 20 days later and we were officially betrothed.
Our original plan was to elope, just the two of us on March 26th (a Monday!) and then have a reception event for about 150 people after we were married.
I really wanted our wedding to be somewhere far enough away that we wouldn't run into anyone we knew or that a passerby who knew our families would happen to witness it. That may sound silly, as we were literally choosing to "exclude" them from our big event, but we truly love our families and are close to them, and even though we loved the idea of eloping, didn't mean that we wanted our families to feel left out.
It felt weird to think that we would be getting hitched and our parents, siblings and close friends would be at work or be drinking a coffee at home, doing nothing just down the road. So, we picked Whistler. Close enough to us that it wasn't a giant trip, but far enough away that it felt like a bit of a destination.
As we started to plan the big reception to go after our nuptials, it just honestly, became a pain. I think I always believed that I would be someone who loved planning a wedding/reception event. I love beautiful things, I love styling things. I love the details, I love getting lost in Pinterest, I LOVE weddings. But, I just sort of...hated it? It was stressful, and not fun? We weren't enjoying the the process and so....we just decided to drop it! BUT...we decided then, that we would invite our parents and siblings to our elopement in Whistler.
Our two-person event became a 15 person event and honestly, that choice felt really right for both of us. Once we settled there, it really felt good. Our parents were over the moon, and honestly, it has really changed my relationship, specifically with my dad. Though I am sad that some of our best friends won't be there, I am thankful and excited to share this experience with our parents and my siblings.
This post is long, but I guess I just wanted to say that....it's okay not to love the process, and it's okay to make a wedding choice that feels right that others may not love. I am sure that some people have felt sad or disappointed that they aren't invited (and we're sorry!) but at the end of it all, Matthew and I just really want to be married, with our short engagement, we needed to plan a day that felt right to both of us.
Not too big, and not too small. Just right.